Anyone But Drake Maye
Mandatory Credit: Trevor Ruszkowski-USA TODAY Sports
You, your mom, your dad, and your day drinking uncle are all wondering the same thing as we approach the 2024 NFL Draft. Who are the Minnesota Vikings going to draft at QB?
They might trade up to five, maybe four, maybe they stand pat and watch the board unfold in front of them. I don’t have a crystal ball, nor am I going to convince you that I do. I know the same players as you do and we all have our preferred options, BUT for me there is one clear thumbs down, zero out of five stars, PTSD inducing option that gives me the sweats late at night. Please, for the love of Dennis Green, give me anyone, but Drake Maye.
You might want to tell me about his numbers. You might want to hit me over the head repeatedly about how 2022 was better than 2023, but I DO NOT CARE. The young man simply does not pass the eye test as an elite, franchise changing QB. He is the QB prospect equivalent of vanilla ice cream. Is it good? Yes. Is it anything special? Unequivocally no.
Let’s dig into the numbers. In 2023, Maye passed for 3,608 yards, threw 24 touchdowns against nine interceptions. Do you know who else had similar, if not even more impressive numbers? Zach Wilson. Wilson passed for 3,692 yards, threw 33 touchdowns against only three interceptions in his final season at BYU prior to being drafted by the New York Jets. Do you know who blows both of these dry, unbuttered pieces of toast out of the water? Case Keenum. Keenum passed for 5,631 yards, threw an insane 48 touchdowns against five interceptions in his final college season. What do all three of these QBs have in common? They cannot play at an elite level in the NFL. Maye received a prospect grade of 6.5 by NFL.com. Wouldn’t you know it, that’s another thing Maye and Wilson have in common.
People like to say “numbers don’t lie”. Numbers don’t lie about the past, but they have an unfortunate track record of lying about the future.
So what are the “analysts” saying about Drake Maye? I’ve come across plenty of comparisons ranging from Justin Herbert to Josh Allen. Boy do people love their comps. When I scoured the internet for some juicy takes on other turds who were drafted too high, I found that Blake Bortles had a comp of Ben Roethlisberger. Interesting. Go on. It can go the other direction too. An AFC scout was quoted as saying pre-draft Aaron Rodgers was comparable to Joey Harrington. Whoops. The holy grail of terrible comps: ESPN’s own Mel Kiper had a pre-draft comp for JaMarcus Russell. Who was that you say? None other than John Elway. My goodness, I can’t even articulate a fun, playful bookend to this section better than that last little nugget.
In summary, if it quacks like a duck, and walks like a duck, and can’t get off its first read like a duck, then it’s Drake Maye. I’m not sure my scarred, black hole of a heart can handle a Christian Ponder, but with a better jawline, era as a Vikings fan. I’d rather watch Kirk Cousins throw behind the sticks on third down for $180 million than have to watch in horror as Justin Jefferson scratches and claws his way out of Minnesota because we failed, yet again, to secure our future at QB.
Let’s not fool ourselves, JJ will not stick around for a Zach Wilson-esqe experiment. However, IF the Vikings decide to draft Maye in April (please don’t let that be a thing people say), then I will put my trust in our resident jawline positive head coach to get the most out of him. I will want so badly to be wrong. A loyal fan trying to convince himself that Drake Maye can and will develop into the great QB some believe he can be. I’ll tell my mom to close her DMs, get the nachos ready, and put on her best Jim Kleinsasser because Zach Wilson 2.0 is coming to town. Please Kwesi, save us all.
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